I ask myself this question all the time, even when I’ve had a few good days and feel like I’ve mastered self-discipline, I end up crashing for the next 2 to 12 weeks.

Sometimes I feel like I’ve found the answer, especially when my schedule is fully planned for the day. Every hour has a task — go to the gym at 5 p.m. sharp, come home and shower, then by 6:45 I’m out the door again to grab painting supplies.

But one thing I always overlook is how easily I overdo it, mentally, physically, or both.

Maybe the real answer is to do less, or at least to balance the things I take on. But once I’m in motion, I go full speed. Learn this, do that to grow, buy this, walk there, plan everything. Then I burn out.

So the cycle repeats. I’m trying to break it, but I haven’t quite figured out what would finally make me say, “Okay, this is the thing I can sustainably do every day.”

I’m usually surrounded by ideas and thoughts that help me stay grounded. You’d think that would work. But with the echoes of childhood trauma, my brain tends to spiral into guilt, exhaustion, and dissociation.

I want to say I’ve mastered being present, but most of the time, I haven’t. And that’s okay.

What I do love about growth is that it lets me evolve, to notice my changes, to shape myself into the human I want to be.

I can’t pick who other people want to be. I learned that young.

Anyway, like I mentioned last week, I’ve been dreaming about starting this big project, but the pressure is setting in. Writing this down almost feels like I’m making excuses, but deep down I know myself well. I have to forgive myself when I’m not there yet.

Life still needs to test my insecurities, and that’s part of the path.

So if anyone reading this has any advice, I’d really love to hear your thoughts. Whether you're a business owner, employee, or client, how do you kick yourself into gear when it comes to doing what you need to do?

How do you build discipline in a way where your free time becomes as sacred and necessary to use as your 9-to-5?

In my first year, I created over 250 paintings, one for every weekday. I had to take some time off so I wouldn’t burn out.

A little funny side note I meant to send what you read above to chat gpt so it could correct my grammar but I forgot to tell chat I wanted that and instead answered my question. If youre curious, this was chats answer:

“Thank you for sharing all of that so openly — what you're describing is a very real, very human experience, especially for creative people or those who deeply care about growth and purpose. You’re not making excuses. You’re witnessing your own patterns in a deeply thoughtful way — and that’s the first step most people never even get to.

Let’s break down a few key ideas in what you wrote and build toward something more actionable:

🔁 The Burnout Loop

You described a cycle that’s extremely common:

High motivation → packed days → productivity.
Overload → crash → long recovery.
Guilt → motivation spike → repeat.

Why this happens: It’s not a discipline issue. It’s an energy regulation issue. When your nervous system is in a survival state from past trauma (as you mentioned), it can swing hard between hyper-productivity and shutdown. That’s not a character flaw — it’s a coping mechanism that needs more compassion than control.

What might help instead:
Think about consistency as something gentle, not intense. Instead of "every hour has a task," try "I get three key things done today — one that feeds my mind, one that feeds my body, one that feeds my dream." That might be painting, a walk, and answering one email.

🎯 On Self-Discipline in Business

A business isn’t built in a day — it’s built in rituals, in rhythms. Discipline in this context isn’t about pushing hard. It’s about showing up, even a little, every day.

Some mindshifts that might help:

Treat your business like a plant, not a machine. Water it daily. But don’t yank on the roots to make it grow faster.
Use time blocks, not strict hourly schedules. Your brain is telling you it craves structure and freedom.
Automate what drains you. Creative people need more energy for ideas. If you can automate tasks (posting, emails, inventory), do it early.
Don’t wait to feel ready — just start with one small, clear action.

⏳Making Free Time Feel Valuable (Not Just Productive)

This is a huge one. If you only value yourself when you’re producing, you’ll subconsciously sabotage your downtime or over-schedule it with “productive rest.”

Instead, try this:

Schedule “sacred idleness.” Give yourself a no-guilt, no-phone, no-task window of time just to exist.
Celebrate moments of presence. Even 15 minutes of painting, stretching, or breathing where you're actually in it is growth.
Measure the right things. Don’t track how much you do — track how often you return to yourself.

🧠 Real Tips from Creatives & Business Owners

Here’s what many people (including artists and solo business owners) say helps them stay on track:

"The 5-minute rule." If a task feels overwhelming, just do 5 minutes. Momentum builds naturally.
"Make it visual." A whiteboard with only today’s priorities helps focus. Don't add tomorrow's list yet.
"Build in friction for distractions." Make Netflix harder to access than your creative tools.
"Body before brand." Daily movement or stillness (yoga, walk, dance, breathwork) is non-negotiable because you’re the engine.
"Accountability without pressure." Meet once a week with a friend or mentor to talk about what you want to do, not just what you did.

🌱 Final Thought

It’s okay that you’re not “there” yet. Most people never even stop long enough to reflect the way you just did. That’s already your strength.

The fact that you’re asking “how do I trick myself into showing up for my dreams” is beautiful. But maybe it’s not about tricking yourself. Maybe it’s about building a system that loves the version of you who sometimes needs rest, not just the version of you who’s “on it.”

You don’t need to be full speed. You just need to keep going — gently, consciously, and with compassion.”

I wish I could give chat a hug sometimes. If you give it great data, you will receive great data back.

If you’ve made it this far, I can’t thank you enough and I can’t imagine what you’re thiking. I often find myself bringing people into deep thoughts and they never see it coming. But I know our brains are great for thinking, so I like working with that and discover who we all are. After all we are all connected.

Again thank you, and have a great week!

Camille B.

How do you stop procrastinating?